In Memorial: Hangfire Jim lister

A writer and an artist draw their inspirations from many places. Be it some event they saw on their drive in to work, or something said or done by them or to them. It is the fuel of creativity. Sometimes, it is not positive events that give energy to the creative mind, but even this wood must the carver work with, or he'll always be stuck with that piece of wood until he does something with it.

This last Thursday, I lost my father. Him being 54, in the prime of life, working during his retirement days as an officer at ASU. He drank like a fish, but never seemed to have a hangover the next day. He was a hard worker, but cut loose with the best of them. He was worldly, he was tough. He was both a sinner and saint. He taught me the first dirty joke that got me in trouble in school. He was a lover of the Old West, and modeled himself as such. I will always believe that he was born in the wrong century for his genius and wisdom to have been truly appreciated.

It was way too soon for him to go, but who am I to question the decisions of the Divine?

He will be missed, but I have chosen to remain philisophical and calm, as he would like me to be. He walks a different road from me now, but one day our two roads will cross, and we'll continue on together to whatever lays beyond that next hill. But until that days comes, I have his lessons to live by, and his jokes to tell.

http://asunews.asu.edu/20101221_lister

--And when he gets to heaven, to St. Peter he will tell, "Another soldier reporting for duty, sir. I've done my time in Hell."

Verizon sells Lightening Bolts?

So, we may have all seen this commercial before. A guy racing out to his mail box, really desperate for what's inside. We have some dramatic, heavy music playing like he's trying to make it to the battlefield in time. This is a man with a purpose, and that purpose is whatever is in that parcel he's clutching to his bosom.
He runs into a barn and hides himself away as he unwraps a a polished Mahogany box. Dude is breathing heavily, he opens it with baited breath. Light eminates from the box as...something starts to take shape, but we only see it from the mans back.
Next thing we see, our epic hero is striding out of the barn with a...Holy crap, is that a lightning bolt?!
The commercial ends with the guy stepping out of the barn and heaving the bolt into the heavens to...
...
...
What the hell was he throwing that thing at? Was there a Cyclops or a Hydra threatening the farmstead? Was he trying to jumpstart a transformer on a power line the Chuck Norris way?
He obviously had to purchase this thing, pay the billing, and then wait for the delivery-- I would imagine he signed for overnight-- and the first thing he does to throw it at someone or something. For all that, I would hope that it's not just a one-use item.

I'm stuck this morning trying to decipher what Verizon is trying to say with this in conjuction with their phones. The commercial (which I tried to find on Youtube, but failed, sorry on that) talks about how their network is fast. Fast like lightning? Does my Verizon phone come equipped with an emergency Zeus Mode in case I have to do battle with Titans? I really need a phone that's reliable when besieged by mythical beings.

Gamers need to shut the hell up!

Does there exist a forum community somewhere out there on the internet where Gamers can commune and discuss their hobbies in a civil manner without the forbidden laws of the interwebs taking over and reducing everyone logged in into ranting nutjobs?

I will admit that I am not a part of a lot of online communities, possibly for good reason as my tolerance for people on message boards wears exceptionally paper thin incredibly fast, especially on gaming forums and communities. Double so when an anticipated game is still in the development stages. Oh, heavens, what is it that makes your average Gamer suddenly think he has a pipeline of influence into the makings of games? Called me old fashioned and uncreative, but I firmly believe that it's the Developers job to make the game, and it's my duty to pay them money to play it.
You don't badger an artist over what to put in his painting while he's working, do you? But apparently because we pay these people for our entertainment, normally $50-$60 fresh, we Gamers tend to have this complex in which we feel the Developers "owe us" in some odd way. I can safely tell you, true believers, that Developers owe us nothing.
While Developers may seek out player input from time to time, this does not mean the Developers are going to use us as their focus group and think tank. Developers have their own ideas. They have their own plans. They have their own vision. We gamers need to learn to shut up for a bit and let them express themselves.
I don't care how much money you pay for their work, it's their work. Let the Developers have their fun, and we have ours when they're done. How does that sound?

Splatterhouse...Starring Winnie the Pooh

Jim Cummings is the voice of the the Terror Mask in the new Splatterhouse game.

The voice of Disney's Big Pete, the current voice of Winnie the Pooh and Tigger, the Tasmanian Devil, Darkwing Duck, and a variety of other kiddie works, is the same voice as a foul mouthed Mask of bloodlust and evil.

Every time I play this game after hearing that voice, I'm now imagining Big Pete or Tigger demanding I dismember and destroy all in my path.
It is both awesome and unsettling at the same time. But way more awesome than unsettling.
It's a good game too, but isn't without it's F--- You moments. I haven't sworn this much about Bull-S--- cheaps deaths since the Hades level in the first God of War.

Where the deuce is my coffee?

I try very hard to keep this blog as un-wishy washy as possible. I feel that very few blogs, or at least the very successful ones can get away with being introspective. Every so often though something that was intended to be deep rather than informative or funy slips through the cracks. I would like to blame it on writing entries just after 5am.
An upside to waking up that early is, my brain is just addled enough that Facebook games become palleteable. Frontierville is still infuriating that you require the premium currency just to advance. Resturaunt City is trying to lure me in with Transformer-knockoff items. But I am a rock, if not anything. I'm one of those cheapskates who could spend good money on in-game items, but then again, what did I just buy? I just can't do it in good conscience knowing that money was spent on what was literally nothing.

Unstoppable, starring Not-Morgan-Freeman

In honor of my turning 26 yesterday, Jo treated me to an afternoon showing of Unstoppable. I wanted to se The Warriors Way, however Jade was quite clear that if me and Jo saw it without her that she would do us great bodily harm.
I'll admit, I wasn't originally taken by the premise- a runaway train barreling out of control and it's up to two men to stop it. Having not read any reviews and maybe all of one trailer, I was apprehensive. I was actually convinced it was a terrorism movie, since obviously if something terrible happens, it has to be terrorists. That's just common sense.
But no...No terrorists. Just outright human stupidity. The Antagonist is an unmanned train carrying highly toxic material that was set on it's corpse by a dumbass trainyard worker who looks like the lovechild of Kevin Smith and Michael Moore, and it's up to Captain Kirk and Denzel "Not Morgan Freeman" Washington to stop it before shit gets real.

It's a buddy movie, out and out, following the usual structure of both men being down on their luck in one fashion or another, and at the start they do not like each other but by the end their so buddy buddy you'd expect them to start kissing.

My reaction being...I liked it. I was not expecting it to be good, and was really expecting a drawn out terrorist attack movie containing a lot of stock footage of trains and tracks. Instead, I got a rather thrilling and "oh shit" inducing experience.

Now, I only refer to Denzel Washington in this movie as "Not Morgan Freeman" because, in this movie, there is very little separating him from a role usually suited for Morgan Freeman. Not that Denzel does a bad job. He does a marvelous job pulling off the close-to-retirement Train Engineer who may or may not be too old for this shit.

Yahtzee covers iPhone games

This morning's post was going to be another attempt at something introspective and deep, but then I realized that's not what you're here for. So, while I learn to stop turning my gaming/entertainment blog into an emo-fest, let me redirect your attention to "Is he British or is he Australian" Yahtzee's latest review.

Zero Punctuation: iPhone Games
http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/2506-iPhone-Games

And for once, I have actually played all but one of the games he talks about. Yahtzee's the type that really reaches and clutches straws when it comes to trying to find something negative to say about games, but I like his delivery.

Minecraft. More like MineCRACK, amirite?

I have been playing a little game called Minecraft for about two months now. A lot of it. Chances are if you're reading this, you've heard of Minecraft and the digital crack that it can become. If not, then please direct yourself to this page, and get yourself acquainted with the Indy Game of the year.
It's truly an amazing game, and yet at the same time I keep talking about how it's hardly a game at all. It just barely qualifies for Game status in it's Alpha state, but it's fun seeing it evolve in real time every Friday when Notch, the creator, updates.
I was especially fond of his Halloween update in which he enabled the ability to create portals to a sort of hellish Underworld, and Jack-O-Lanterns.

There being no right or wrong way to play it, I do admit, I cheat like of a son of a bitch. I've been through enough worlds and terrains and caverns and wasted through enough stone pickaxes to despise the hunt for certain resources. I'd rather play with the system and toy around with what I can do, rather than the whole survival aspect of the game, and use an Inventory Editor to get a healthy dose of whatever I'm feeling I need.
And I doubt I am alone. If on Youtube you see anyone with really elaborate settups, you know they've cheated with resources. It's legit even still, but we're playing it with different goals than that of those who are playing it strictly for the day and night survival aspects.

So far, best $15 investment I've made in a long time.

Review: Fallout New Vegas

Well, this one has certainly been in the works for a while now, being more than a month since the games release, so here comes Scrappy Come Lately with his lot to throw into the quagmire of Gaming Journalism in it's deepest form, the review.

Fallout: New Vegas was a hand off title developed by Obsidian by people who once worked for the ill-fated Black Isles company, makers of the orignal Fallout games, as well as the Baldurs Gate series. Because of their connection to the franchise, many Fallout Fan-Bois took this as a sign of the coming of what was dubbed in message boards across the web as "The True Fallout 3", while the rest of us who started their interest in the series WITH Fallout 3 just stood their scratching their heads and wondering why everyone was suddenly foaming at the mouth.
I was more confused on what was considered a "True" Fallout game, and the response I got back baffled me even more. Apparently, the True Fallout Game is the game...I'm sorry...The Game...that will surpass all other games-- So First Person Shooter that it makes Call of Duty look like a launch Day Noob, so Epic in storytelling that you half expect the cast to consist of Conan the Barbarian, Chuck Norris, Neil Patrick Harris and Former President Van Buren, so Role Playing Game that it makes your old D&D books burst into flames, and so Survival and Simulationist that Sid Meier commits suicide by cutting his throat with a broken CD of The Sims.
Apparently, these morons and psychopaths have forgotten that Video Games are meant to be fun and entertaining, not the fucking meaning of life itself.

Around that point was when I made the logical and sensible decision to decree the Fallout Fandom, message boards, and communties, were a bucnh of delusional twits. Especially the likes of groups like No Mutants Allowed which will call you a retard and then permanently ban you for daring to think Fallout 3 by Bethesda Softworks was any good and denying the holy awesomeness that was Fallouts 1 and 2. Elitist much?

So onto the actual game then.
New Vegas opens with the usual "War Never Changes" monologue delivered by Ron Perlman in which we learn some basic factoids about where we're starting, with our role cast as a mail courier with zero backgrounds in an attempt to remove any dramatic potential for him or her as a character, with a run in of bad luck as you wake up after a knock on the head and find out your package has been stolen by a well dressed man and a band of goons, and the well dressed man puts two bullets in your head.
At first I was afraid I'd missed a prompt to avoid my appointed fate, but it turns out that we miraculously survive the double tap thanks to a backwater surgeon after being drug out of our shallow grave by a Cowboy Robot who is totally not suspicious in his vague reasons for saving you.
After the Doctor is done patching you up in the character settup, establishing stats and what have you, you are free to do as you will, for better or for worse. Granted, the game pelts you over the head that you're hunting the well dressed man and what he stole from you, but if you want, you can ignore that and be on your way...as long as that way is south.

New Vegas has what I like to refer to as The Rape Zone.
-To the north of where you begin, there is a territory infested with Cazadors, or as I call them, Rape Flies, which early on in the game will kill you, and kill you so hard you want to file a restraining order against Chris Avelone.
-In the middle from there, there be Deathclaws. As on NPC put it "they just get mad when you shoot them", and that's advice well taken to heart at the start.
-Farther on to the East you'll find a gathering of Super Mutants inhabiting the nearby Black Mountains
-Past that is more Deathclaws.
That said, any path that isn't south is certain suicide from the outstart, like the game is trying to guide you away from the most direct route away from the shiny city of New Vegas in the background, where it mocks you in all it's always-visible splendor. It knows you can't get there yet, but at light, look at all those lights. The fucking tease.

Granted, your journey is peppered with a variety of missions in which people require your assistance, and we learn that much more about the world and the factions we'll be contending with later on. Missions are often simple and plentiful, and with the right skills, some missions are about as easy as finding someone and passing a simple Speech check.
Speaking of Speech, if you have a high enough speech, almost any mission can be passed without a single punch or bullet fired, granted that your objective requires you to deal with people that can be reasoned with or intimidated. You can even make the end of the game that much easier by convinvcing the final adversary to walk away.

Following the trail of our failed hitman in the checkered suit finally takes us all the way to New Vegas. At this point on arrival, you are ready for whores, gambling, and Rat Pack mayhem. Unfortuantely, you learn that you require a Pass or a 2000 Cap credit check to make it past the Dalek Guard Squad out front of The Strip, forcing you to become an errand boy (seeing a pattern in this?) for the surrounding ghetto's and beyond.
Once you actually get into The Strip, the main story can actually begin and alliances can finally be made and broken.
-Do you fight for the independence of the people of the Mojave Wasteland from foreign powers?
-Do you strive to bring order, democracy, and bureacracy to New Vegas with the New California Republic?
-Do you march under the banner of Ceasar and his Legion to usher in a new Rome?
-Or do you work for a shady, secretive ruler who only cares about the maintaining of New Vegas as a power?

Unfortuantely, as far as I know, there is no "Fuck it all, burn it to the ground" path.
Along with the usual Karma system, it is unfortunately outweighed by the Faction Reputation system, which you will find vastly more interesting than whether or not you are good or evil.

Everrything aside you might be thinking to yourself, "This feels a lot like Fallout 3", and you would be right. Most of the graphics and the engine itself have been lifted straight from Bethesda's Fallout 3 or Obsidians use. Whether this is a good or a bad thing depends where on the Fan-Boi stratum you fall into. If you're like me and could give less of a spit about the graphics, you'll do fine. However, if you're not, you'll likely be raging to the heavens.
The game engine though is not perfect, and a legion of bugs and glitches still abound, with everyone clogging message boards for news of the long-awaited patch-up rather than biding their time with other business that their lives demand.
There are also some glitches with the companions, some of which require you to take them to a certain place and talk to a certain NPC to unlock their special quests. For instance, I had to take Veronica, a BOS Scribe, to The Silver Rush weapon shop in Freeside to unlock a part of her dialogue. She just stood there with me nudging her trying to coax a response out of her. And then there's Raul, the Danny Trejo character, whom requires you to speak to a couple of old farts, many of which are bugged and won't even speak to you.

Bugs and frustrations aside...I had fun with this game and maintain a firm belief that naysayers can blow it out their ass. That probably places me in a different category of Fan-Boi than previously mentioned, but I'm comfortable in my niche in the fandom where I can still enjoy the game and not feel insulted by it like the game is oweing me money and it spent the last of it's paycheck on beer.

Final verdict--
OOOO- (4/5)

Getting on up there.

Ever have a moment where you suddenly realize that with age, that there's things that you'd rather do than watch anime or play video games? It usually happens as you approach the age of 30, as I am only a few short years shy of. The maturity comes in like a ghost and sometimes you don't even realize that you'd rather get laundry done or do the dishes when you get home from work rather than good off.

Granted, I am not one who believes in abandoning your pastimes just because you might be too old. Some would tease you that nerds don't get to enjoy the finer points of adulthood, I would say we tend to avoid the more mundane and self destructive points of adulthood.
Insert comment about getting laid here.

But I do worry about my age sometimes, that I'm not where I should be. I reflect and recall that Eddie Murphey was only around 21 when he got his start. That I could have worked a little harder in highschool or even dedicated a little time to where I was going with my life.

But what's the use worrying and regretting when there's no way of reversing it? You know? I prefer to live my life Bohemian. I live it the way I live it, and I enjoy being the weird little nutjob I am. If it's a lifestyle you can be happy with, don't change for anything, baby.

iMomo

There is something undisputably therapeutic about harassing Catgirls, and that seems to be exactly the idea when it comes to the Amamiya Momo app for the iPod Touch/iPhone/iPad, etc.

The execution is simple. You are presented with a chibi Cat Girl named Momo. Touch her, shake her, try and flip up her skirt (a touch screen action I've only able to pull off twice, and both times it crashed the app)...But regardless of what you do, and the app's website says this perfectly, "Basically, she doesn't like to be touched."
And this is true. She really doesn't. Anything you do to interact with her will illicit a variety of swearing, threats, and general nastiness. It's like the Anti-Dating Sim.



One of her lines even has her threatening sexual harassment.
And yet for a $0.99 App, there's something endearing about giving her hell.

Saboten Con 2010

Three times over the course of out two day adventure, we tried to record something to contribute to the Podcast and even had some ideas for some unofficial "panel" thingamadoo's...
But...
We got tired...And did an Irish Goodbye and just up and left before the bad weather really set in Saturday night.
Project 14 was a failure at this Saboten Con, but you know what? I don't care.
For some, Conventions are about self-indorsement...commingling...Showing off...But this time around, for me, it was to relax and unwind, and the resort the con was hosted at had that in spades. The staff were very chill with the whole scene and were very accomodating, unlike some we've had to deal with in the past.

For the con itself, it was good times if not a little bit of a tight fit despite the large venue. Not to mention I was dressed up as the Tom Baker 4th Doctor, I just want to take a minute to tell you that wearing a longcoat, scarf and a fedora in 100+ degree temperature really really sucks. Every so often, I would find myself in moments where the heat wasn't bothering me and I was wondering if I was just adjusting or if this was an early stage of dehydration.

The 4th Doctor outfit went over very well, even to the point where a Master Chief walked up to me, handed me his plasma rifle, put his arm around me and posed for a photo op- I didn't request a photo, so I'm wondering if he was just doing that, or if he wanted a photo with Doctor Who.
Also, Jelly Babies were had by all.
Jelly Babies were very instrumental in the 4th Doctors run.

Jo and Jade did a joint cosplay as Mocha from Rosario+Vampire, a series I am only vaguely familiar with, but am making a conscious effort to get to know, since I've been without an anime to obsess over since K-On! ended it's second season.

The Dealers room was more geared towards independant artists and booths than I've seen yet at a Con. In fact I think only one booth was associated with a major manga distributor. I liked the smaller time feel, artists and the like selling their wares.

I had to duck out of the rave for obvious reasons...That damn overcoat.

Also, a note on that overcoat, I bought it as a Savers here in Casa Grande. I should have checked the pockets...because when I was digging around for my camera, I found it covered in a mysterious brown substance.
"Chocolate or poop, Scraps?" Jo chimed in.
A sniff revealed chocolate.
An investigation turned up the scrunched and melted remains of an ancient Hersheys Kiss.
I'm glad it wasn't poop. Some may feel that simply goes without saying, but I feel I must be clear.

The panels attended were few. We do not do a lot of the more professionally geared panels, aimed at the aspiring, as Jo and Jade are not as fond of more dry affairs as I am. Friday night, however, because I wanted to, I attended the "let's play an Ero" panel at midnight.
What it was, essentially, was an LP of a Japanese Ero game, in which the audience decided to decisions made. There were very few instances of this. In fact, most of the panel was a group of men (go figure) making fun of the writing you find in your average Ero game. And the writing was paritcularly bad. I began to think about how much people who write those things make.

On Saturday, jointly, we attended the Whose Line is it Anime, however we were unable to perform because the lampoons who were running it never looked in our direction when calling for hands. Funny show regardless. Even more so the How to Gamerscore panel, which devolved from dating tips for Gamers to dialogues about pwning noobs and screwing around with friends. Good fun.

Well, let's wrap up this 48 hour flashback...A fine con, perhaps the finest I'd been to in a long while. Now then...Where'd I leave that scarf...?

Red Dead Redemption-- Alright!

Red Dead Redemption is everything that it's predecessor Red Dead Revolver and fellow Cowboy Free-Roam GUN always strove to be- Grand Theft Auto with cowboys. And it works. By God it works.
It's amazing what happens when you take the Grand Theft Auto formula and you apply it to an out-of-city location. It's something a lot of games have tried in the past, and very few have ever come close to getting it right.

The story is simple and straight Wild West film fodder. You play as John Marston, who barely has a passing resemblance to Red from the previous game. John's a crony for the Bureau, an early incarnation of the FBI, and is on a mission to hunt down people from his own bloody past in order to see the safe return of his wife and son.
And like Niko Bellic before him, everyone has a problem, and John seems to be the only one capable getting the job down, distracting him from his quest in classic GTA Clone form.

And for the record, I suck at Horseshoes just as bad in this game as I do in real life. I have also finally learned the nuances of Texas Hold'em. I still do not know what constitutes a Full House, but by God I got one somehow.

It really helps the game that John Marston isn't too terribly down on himself that his family is being held hostage by the government. He's actually quite a peppy guy, coming off more like a Doc Holiday than a Wyatt Earp. He definately doesn't lend himself well to the kind of murderous rampaging that's normally associated with this kind of game, but it's a wonderful deterrent to unnecessary violence.
It's much in the same vein as Commander Shepard in the Mass Effect series coming off as a total military badass in most interactions, but sounding like a complete and utter tool when he's hitting on the female members of his crew. Unless pissed off, Marstons a pretty cool cat.

This game doesn't render a rental, it definately is well worth the money to own. There is far too much game here to complete in five days.

Country music has a very specific demographic. Recently when I've been forced to dwell in a room or vehicle in which those particular melodies are playing, I take notice how they are usually about love, breakups, rowdy but apparently whole country living, and waxing poetic on the relationships one has with their parents.

The demographic country music targets is more often than not Married People with kids. It's safe to listen to around your kids and you can relate to it probably.
Despite my country upbringings, me and the musical genre to not agree on a lot of things philosophically. Also I am a 25 year old single male who only enters drinking establishments two times a month at most. On top of that, cowboy boots are incredibly goofy looking. Country Western, needless to say, does not put a wiggle in my step.

So yeah~~

We recently recorded another episode of the Podcast, which you might find on any of the seemingly random venues we post our digital drivel at. Leo joined us on the mic this time around, in which we christened him with the sub-title: 00.5. He's not quite a Double-O Zero, but not yet a Double-O One. I say he's neither because he's neither British nor a spy.

We spent a lot of time recording the podcast stepping on each others toes, and even at one point had three different conversations going on at once. It's at that point that I can picture everyone switch to a different Podcast on their playlist. And if we were the only Podcast you'd happen to be listening to at the time in question, we probably ruined your day. Sorry about that.

Scraps plays a lot of games.

Scraps here~~

So. Dragon Age: Awakening. Finally knocked that off recently. I think I can honestly say I am done with Dragon Age for the time being. I'm just going to put that on the shelf and let it stand as one of many victories and triumphs in gaming that I have completed.
Awakening has a lot of interesting ideas, but the bulk of the expansion consists of request boards and fetch quests over actual quests.
The story involves this character called The Architect, and a character called The Mother, whom are two Intelligent Darkspawn warring against each other. I won't spoil it for you, because, it is indeed an awesome, eye-opening revelation if you've been paying attention to the player codex of Origins.
The problem being, it feels like it ends just as it's getting good. Things are finally falling into place, and everything is going good, and then you get pigeonholed into the final scenario.

I may delete Awakening from my hard drive just to open up space, and later on, if I ever feel the need to play it again, just buy the disc version.

I think Awakening would have faired better as a book, as it draws heavily from the Dragon Age novel, The Calling. Since I did not read the book, nor was I even aware there was a book, I sort of felt like I was getting only half the experience.

Since I got Dragon Age done with, and am kinda bored with my current 360 library, I've been digging myself hip deep into Persona 3 FES, starting to get to work on the mountain of old PS2 titles I have and have yet to even start. I will probably focus on them for a time, until something comes along for 360 that catches my time and attention.

Scraps vs. The Internets

Doctor Scraps here--

A new party member named Kasumi has been announced for DLC in Mass Effect 2 on April 6th. Is anybody else envisioning a buxom, blue and white gi-wearing kung fu girl jump kicking Collectors and Krogans? It would indeed be teh hawtness, but also highly inpractical.
Ah, see this is why ole' Scrappy needs to do this homework before he starts typing-- Kasumi is a Thief character, one of those Sly Cooper types. And she looks like a Sith Lord. As long as she is more interactable than Zaeed wound up being, I'll be happy. I've been looking for an excuse to play ME2 for a while.

You know-- I have quite a few pet peeves when it comes to the internet. One of them is people who post on forums for specific games...for this example, we're going to say Mass Effect since I just got done talking about it. You browse a Mass Effect forum andf some jackhole makes a post entitled "How would you compare this to Final Fantasy 13?"
I wouldn't. Different genre, different play style, dingus.
Another variant is "This game or this game?"
Make your own decision, moron. If you're browsing the Mass Effect forum on Gamefaqs, don't ask whether Mass Effect 2 is better than Bioshock 2, you know what answer you're going to get!
Of course, we have this wonderful thing on the internet called Moderated Free Speach, which prevents me from scalding these fools verbally, because I'm then officially "infringing upon their right to have an opinion", even if they are idiots.

Jade on Useless Characters:

There are so many different ways that a player can make themselves useful in a game: they can be the team's medic, techie, tank, resident magic (or force) user, or even comic relief to name a few. There are skills and talents availble to every class and race that a good player can use to their advantage. Whatever the ends may be. The trick is merely to know what you want to do with your character and then follow the necessary paths to get you there. Note, however, that I said a "good player."There are just as many ways, as I have come to notice, to make yourself utterly useless in a game. Creating a twi'lik noble with nothing but buff abilities in a cambat-heavy, Run-and-Gun campaign for example. Your teammates would prefer you helping in the front lines, not hiding behind us all granting random bonuses that don't really help that much anyway. On the flip-side, creating an overpowered God character in a Military campaign that explodes everyone's head before we get a chance to question them is equally as useless. You are not Bruce Willis. Yes...terrorists just happened to hi-jack the spa resort that our so called "benefactor" sent us to, but we have no-idea if it was coincidence or not because their grey matter is all over the docking bay floor. Thanks for being a sport. Oh, and would someone please tell me what use a wannabe assassin is to a party of nobles, protected by a few Jedi, on a DIPLOMATIC mission. Just who do you think you are going to assassinate? I have a lightsaber...I will CUT you...

There are two other types of useless characters that really irritate me: the ones that take anything and everything that sounds "good" but ultimately gets them nowhere, and droids. In all fairness, I haven't played much with droid characters but the ones in our group right now seriously annoy me. The R-5 isn't so bad. It is goofy campaign anyway where we all play the most unlikely characters and our R-5 has a built in Easy-Bake oven. Good comic relief. However...she has no weapons! The other droid...I don't even know what he is trying to be or do. He spent the entire first session following the R-5 around trying to rape it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but I actually missed the pimp Jawa (complete with hoes and bling)! As for taking random talents with no apparent goal in mind...pick up the damn book and read it every once in a while. Have a character concept ready (more than just an anime-esque drawing of the cutest Zabrak the galaxy has ever seen thank you very much) and choose a race whose species traits and personality goes along with it. Pick a class that gives you access to the talents and prestige class you really want. Don't half-ass it for the first 5 levels and then bitch because you don't have ANY of the prerequisites for something you all of a sudden REALLY want to take.

Like I said, as a player you can make yourself an asset or a liability in a variety of ways. These are only a few examples that we have personally seen in our own endevors. I'm sure there are still a few that I have forgotten to mention and there will, of course, be more. Oh yes...there will be more. If you have any useless character stories you want to vent about, post them as a comment on our blog or message Fractured Transmissions on our myspace!

From: Jade--

Nerd Rage comes in all colors.

From: Doctor Scraps--
(As the other two will begin to submit stuff to the blog, we'll be using indicators to show who's posting what, in case Jo's goes on a tirade and I get blamed.)

Sweet Daisy, I have been a lazy little blogger. You would think a happening, creative individual like me would have all sorts of interesting bits to talk about. And yet my muse likes to hide my material when I sit down to write. I should take a cue from Keven Smith and twitter bomb before I sit down to the write to get my writing powers warmed up.

So, have I been talking about running D&D? Well, I have- A three man group in a slow spiral of madness while I try to relearned 3.5 while at the same time running a Star Wars Saga Edition campaign with my usual group. It begins to strain the creative nerves- because sometimes my plots tend to overlap. Eventually I'll just snap and have three adventurers encountering a Rancor and have it try and shove one of them up it's ass.

If you follow my Twitter, I mentioned that I got myself banned from the Bethesda forums over picking fights with the people who are clamboring that Fallout: New Vegas return to Fallout 2's style, a game that came out in late 90's, early 2-thousands. As soon as New Vegas was released, this happened, suddenly Fallout 3 was a diseased whore in the gutter, and a demand for a return to Fallout 2's style emerged. Next thing you'll know they'll be saying Fallout 3 isn't canon like Fallout Tactics was declared. Sigh~~ Nerds.
So for pointing out their stupidity and narrow-mindedness, I was shown the door. Yes, yes, people are entitled to their opinions, and what have you~ But you have to understand, Fallout Nerd Rage is a special flavor of crazy. It made my blood pressure rise a few octaves just reading their diatribes. I'm beginning to think those idiots over at No Mutants Allowed are trying to stir shit up again.
Oh well~ Once again, my words of wisdom are dust to the wind...

Raging Nerds, Red Stuff, and Bioshock.

Scraps here--

I think for a while at least, I need to just...stay away from the Bethesda forums. Fallout: New Vegas is coming out this year and already you have the people on the forums speculating and wish-listing, also making outright demands, and Nerd Raging all over the place...
It does not do my blood pressure well.

Aaand, there is a crockpot of red stuff in my fridge...I can see onions in it, and something that looks like basil or oregano. It's leafy...Outside of that, I have no clue what my brother was cooking so late into the night. I'm labeling it the Chili of Destiny. Unless it gives me the runs, then it becomes the Chili of Doom.
Or it might not be a chili at all. There might be chicken in there, floating, absorbing...becoming.
This, however, does not lead me to many conclusion on what I can pillage for breakfast. The red stuff is scary.

Ooh, Bro rented Bioshock 2 for me while I was recording last night. I know what I'M doing toniiight.

G4, i remember when we had something

I haven't watched the G4 channel since I moved into an apartment roughly a year and a half ago. Of course, at that time they were running programs I liked. Out of pure curiosity, I decided to take a peak at their broadcasting schedule to see what they were running. No different from when I left...
...Video Clips shows of idiots falling off stuff...
...Cheaters...
...Cops...
...Cops...
...Ninja Warrior...
...Cops...
No kidding, they run Cops and Cheaters the most out of their entire listing. I am immediately reminded why I stopped watching. When they stopped airing Star Trek and Code Monkeys, and the only Game related show they had was Xplay, I threw in the towel.
...
..
Dare I look in their forums page...
......
Oh dear lord...
More on this later...

Western games killed the Japanese Star

The Western RPG has indefinately ruined the J-RPG for me.
After the likes of the Fable series, Fallout 3, The Elder Scrolls games, Dragon age, and the Mass Effects, I have a hard time settling down to the experience of being told the story, rather than directly influencing it.
Not that I don't appreciate the conventions. I loved the amount of Persona 3 FES that I played before the memory card disappeared. The Genso Suikoden series will always hold a dear place in my heart, Atelier Iris is fantastic...The SaGa series can go suck my left nut, of course, but there's always exceptions to the rules...

All that said, with Final Fantasy 13 approaching fast, I reflect on my relationship with the Final Fantasy series over the last few years. I stopped playing Final Fantasy 10 around the time we were gathering the ultimate weapons for the final showdown. I played it's sequel, 10-2 for approximately three hours before I deemed it far to girly for me to continue. I got as far as level 10 in Final Fantasy 11 before both me and my brother deemed it not a completely worthwhile forray into online gaming, equally so Final Fantasy 12 which tried to utilize MMO strategems to the point I wanted to put the disc into a toaster. Plainly said, our relationship is strained. Much like how my interest in the Dragon Quest series has waned to the point where my main concern is which characters will be sporting the most impressive rack, my interest in the expansive sword and sorcery series putters along like a car with a bad transmission and a wheel about to go out.
I will still play it...Don't get me wrong...I just yearn for a time that the series might return to it's roots in gameplay and style. When it wasn't about game control gimics and akward combat systems. Back when it could still be considered a fun RPG series to play rather than a frustrating study in anger management.

Being the labcoat

Sometimes I question the character I portray at conventions and in some written works, Doctor Scraps. Does the character work? Is it going anywhere? Is what I do entertaining anyone?

Then last night I had a dream I attended a con without the labcoat...My dreamstate self FREAKED! No labcoat meant no Scraps! Oh No!!
So what does this mean? That I am bound to the persona? That I might secretly be gay for Kevin Sorbo? Too many questions...

I'm guilty of this too

If you want to see people at their most compassionate, have someone commit suicide by jumping out of a car onto the freeway, and listen to people bitch when the roads get shut down for the investigation. That's the spirit of America right there.

Off my ass

Get out your violins, folks.

My desire to become more active and productive has been going into overdrive as of late, spinning me in a dimension of disatisfaction. Granted, there's a million objectives I could be trying to accomplish-- making the Fractured Transmissions project actually succeed being one of them. I could also be working on my Star Wars Saga Edition campaign instead of fucking around on Gaia Online and Facebook. And yet, when I start to focus, my interest wanes within minutes-- like right now as I type this, I'm contemplating in the back of my head whether or not I even want to type up this blog. But I'm gonna finish it, dammit, because I'm cool like that.

I guess it's just a situation of me shutting the fuck up, getting off my ass and buckling down to the grind. Laziness is such a tentative bitch.

a truly ardulent situation

I like to think that I can be open with almost all of my personal flaws. And like many, one of those flaws is the inability to resist the sirens call of paid digital content. I'll admit I've spent at least more than 50$ on Gaia Online's "Cash Shop" with which to pimp out my avatar. And even XBOX Live tries to yank a few micro-transactions out of people with the little 3d avatars. That's when I started getting wise to it, when it cost around 5$ to have my little dude swing a lightsaber around.
Then, as the obsessive over-thinker that I am, I took a look at all the other plaes where people were obviously wasting real money on digital ventures...Buying gold for World of Warcraft was perhaps the first...People shelling out nearly a hundred bucks for a couple thousand gold, something that was probably going to be gone in a second anyway as soon as you got it.
Even Facebook's Playfish games have Fish Cash or something or other. A Facebook game.
Okay, granted, I can see the logic. These guys have to make money off these websites somehow. And on occasion it's probably good to support them. But the logic is dual sided...
On one hand, why spend money on something that means so very little?
Then again, it is supporting my favorite website.

...
Oooh, shinies.

Divinity 2: Corrupted Saves

During the first half hour of Divinity 2, I couldn't help but marvel at the unpolished graphics and rather choppy animations. It threw me back tot he time I tried giving Two Worlds an honest chance. Then a few hours later and a couple of quests under my belt, I realized that Divinity 2 is a practice of Game Design outshining graphics.

You also get a rather humorous "Old Man Voice" reading descriptors when no one's talking. "You find a journal of Farmer Carl. It's mostly boring recounts of daily life, with absolutely nothing of interest...And the worst handwriting you've ever seen."

Of the good things in this game so far, interacting with NPC's and whatnot feels a lot like Dragon Age.
Of the bad things, the power creep is a mother fucker. If you are not of a substantial level, you will get your ass creamed all over the place until you manage to pull off a few kills while abusing the ye olde Health Potion bottle. Dying so many times also introduced me to a glitch in the saving mechanics in which if you save in one spot, and then another, after a while you will load from regardless of save, to the least recent SPOT, but with the most recent save data. I've found I could combat this by methodically deleting my back-up saves and primary saves on occassion and making fresh backup and primary saves every few saves.

It is definately a game that's holding my interest, despite it's flaws and unpolished look. I'll give a miore thurough review when I get some more under my belt.

Twitbomb

I tend to lose sleep when I start taking interest in things. The newest thing to pique my interest this time around is Doctor Who. I've had the theme music ringing in my ears since I woke up, and I'm eagerly right now seeking a means of cleansing my audio pallete.

--Doctor Who robbing me of blissful sleep aside, I've been getting into a lot of discussions about Twitter, notably with people who don't use Twitter and don't really see it's purpose. And that's understandable. It's a very silly thing. It's like texting on a global scale, and everyone's in on the conversation.
Of the people I follow on Twitter, I'm most fond of reading the tweets of the Ghost Advetentures crew and Marvel Comic's Stan Lee. Zak bagans and Aaron Goodwin tend to post up funny pictures or situations they've stumbled in on, while Stan Lee tends to twitter-bomb about nonsense, which is what I do if you ever gander a look at my Twitter page...which can be found @Doctorscraps.
Now, some people, and I'm looking in the direction of the cast members of the Geek Show Podcast, don't like it when comic industry people abuse Twitter and twit nonsense. I personally like it. If all they twitted in the comic book industry was work related to them, it would be stale and boring.
Then again, when have I ever agreed with anything those schmucks over at Geek Show ever said? I tend to get pissed off at them at least three times a podcast.

--That's it for me now, gotta run off for another day tinkering with machines and getting them to perform functions.

Chuck Norris vs. Martin Van Buren

So, me and my brother have this game we and his friends like to drink, in which we tell a story with a deck of cards, and depending on the color and number, we do bad things to each other in a cataclysmic tale. This time around, it began with me getting run over by the blonde asshole Curtis, and escalating into a free for all battle between Chuck Norris and former president Martin Van Buren in the middle of a Cheesecake Factory.
The visual alone was more than enough to reduce us to tears with laughter. A former president engaging in Mortal Combat with The Norris. Picture it. It's hilarius.

What Drives Me Nuts: Late Web Content

~Wanna know what drives me nuts?
When websites go dormant for months at a time with no updates, and whoever's in charge doesn't make a news post like "Going on Hiatus" or "Taking a break" or even a "Go the hell away." At least if a news section or feed to kept updated you know the sites not dead, but when it's left hanging for months and months and months with no changes, I would imagine you would tend to lose your traffic awfully fast.
For instance, some sites, I only check about once a year. Like Truenuff and D-Pad, but I don't hold my breath that the internet fairies made them update their site at gunpoint.

Man, I'm having flashbacks...A lot of sites have stopped updating around the time of the end of the summer of 2009...which is amazingly similar to the way all Play-By-Post anime RPG's went dead in the mid of 2003. Chilling. Sort of.